I have never really understood the importance of prayer. I know we are called to pray without ceasing. God also wants us to share our worries, sorrows, and joys with Him. But I have never felt the importance of it on a personal level or what praying without ceasing looks like.
This year at work I made a new friend, a dear friend. She has unknowingly encouraged me this year through her consistent prayer life. We have shared concerns for students and personal life struggles and prayed over those things together. It's a process, but I am learning the importance of consistent daily (hourly and minutely) prayer life.
The most recent occurrence has been a blow to my heart, soul, and spirit. A family who I love and cherish has a devastating spiritual battle being fought, and it is weighing on my heart. The only thing I know to do is pray. Praying is literally all I can do. I desire to offer more, but I have no powers in this situation or any for that matter. Only God has powers to heal, forgive, love, and call those to His glorious name. We can try all we want. We can do anything we want. But without the Lord's divine hand guiding us, it is in vain.
The first and most important thing we can offer ourselves and others is prayer.
I have learned over the past few weeks that the prayers we offer are so important. Not just the dinnertime prayer. Not the short bedtime prayer. But the fall on your knees before the God of the universe because we have nothing else to give prayers. When you begin to understand prayer as the first thing to turn to instead of the last, the Lord begins to change your heart and your desires. You don't want to just pray before a meal. You want to pray without ceasing. All the time. Because you want to tell your Father what is weighing on your heart or what is creating such joy in your life.
It doesn't make sense to me, that through others suffering, the Lord has taught me the necessity of prayer and formed my heart to look more like Him. He wants me to share everything with him no matter how seemingly important or insignificant.
I have started keeping a journal again of those that I am praying for. I encourage you to keep some sort of journal or place notecards around your house to remind yourself of certain friends who need prayer. I also had a friend who sat in her closet to talk to Jesus. It was the only place where she could get away from everything else and spend time with her Father.
Please share any other ideas that have worked for you to help your prayer life grow and mature.
I am so thankful my life belongs to Him.
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Boldness
Since school started a few weeks ago I have been faced with this calling of boldness. I have been shy about my faith and my beliefs instead of being bold.
A few weeks ago, I was having a conversation about living/not living together before marriage, and I just didn't really say much because I was afraid of getting made fun of or not being liked. I felt like I was in high school again. Later that day, I said to myself, why do I care what they think? I have chosen a path that I know I am called to. Why should I be ashamed?
Then twice this week, I had students ask me if I am going to have kids. I answered someday, but I am not married yet. It blew my mind because they said...well that doesn't matter. Again, I didn't say much when I really could have used it for a teaching moment with my kids. It does mean a lot to wait until marriage to have sex/have children. And waiting to have children when you/your spouse are ready, not because it's an accident.
Yesterday, I had a student ask what my purity ring was all about. I really didn't want to talk about sex with my 17 year old male student. But I could still have used the situation to proclaim my faith, and why I have chosen to wait until after I am married. Instead, I was afraid of what dumb high school kids think of me. I tried to explain in the most unawkward way possible, and he said, "man miss, that's really cool." I was floored because he reacted like this was a new concept for him.
I don't know why God has placed me at this particular school, but I do know that I can be a light in a very dark place. But before this can happen, I need my priorities straight. The Lord needs to be number 1. When he is number 1, he will provide the boldness that I am scared to have in my daily life at school. That requires me to make some sacrifices when I don't really feel like following after his plan, when I am lazy/apathetic, or there's a really great tv show on.
Lord,
Thank you for loving us enough to die for our incompleteness. Please forgive us for our faults and worldly desires that turn us away from YOU. Fill us with YOUR boldness and not our own temporary actions. Open our eyes to YOUR plan, and turn our desires towards YOU.
Sincerely, your people
I pray this for my life and yours. I am so very thankful my life belongs to Him.
A few weeks ago, I was having a conversation about living/not living together before marriage, and I just didn't really say much because I was afraid of getting made fun of or not being liked. I felt like I was in high school again. Later that day, I said to myself, why do I care what they think? I have chosen a path that I know I am called to. Why should I be ashamed?
Then twice this week, I had students ask me if I am going to have kids. I answered someday, but I am not married yet. It blew my mind because they said...well that doesn't matter. Again, I didn't say much when I really could have used it for a teaching moment with my kids. It does mean a lot to wait until marriage to have sex/have children. And waiting to have children when you/your spouse are ready, not because it's an accident.
Yesterday, I had a student ask what my purity ring was all about. I really didn't want to talk about sex with my 17 year old male student. But I could still have used the situation to proclaim my faith, and why I have chosen to wait until after I am married. Instead, I was afraid of what dumb high school kids think of me. I tried to explain in the most unawkward way possible, and he said, "man miss, that's really cool." I was floored because he reacted like this was a new concept for him.
I don't know why God has placed me at this particular school, but I do know that I can be a light in a very dark place. But before this can happen, I need my priorities straight. The Lord needs to be number 1. When he is number 1, he will provide the boldness that I am scared to have in my daily life at school. That requires me to make some sacrifices when I don't really feel like following after his plan, when I am lazy/apathetic, or there's a really great tv show on.
Lord,
Thank you for loving us enough to die for our incompleteness. Please forgive us for our faults and worldly desires that turn us away from YOU. Fill us with YOUR boldness and not our own temporary actions. Open our eyes to YOUR plan, and turn our desires towards YOU.
Sincerely, your people
I pray this for my life and yours. I am so very thankful my life belongs to Him.
Friday, December 9, 2011
Count your blessings instead of sheep
So many things have happened this week...
- My Christmas tree and lights are up...and put a smile on my face when I come home from work.
- I have watched White Christmas 4 times now since Thanksgiving...hence the title :D
- I made my last copies of the semester
- I held my kids to deadlines! PTL no (or maybe very little) grading next week...aside from finals. ICK
- Parents are called...less than last six weeks :)
- I have such great friends at work...I don't know what I would do without them. Go crazy probably...oh wait too late ;)
- Claire's band concert was on Wednesday. SO proud of her that she's better than I ever was in 7th grade.
- The fine arts winter extravaganza was last night. It is so wonderful to see the NHS students come together to put on an evening of music, drama, and dancing. I enjoyed every minute!
- One of my kids who barely passed 1st six weeks got a 98 on his test yesterday. I am not going to reach all my kids, but the few that I do reach help me know God has put me in the right place.
- Two of my kids (engaged and in the same class) had their baby boy yesterday. Those two drove me crazy the first few weeks, but I have grown to love them very much. They told me earlier this week that I was the only teacher who asked about the details for her delivery time, etc. It broke my heart that no one else had asked.
- I got to chat with some of the senior girls about diabetes...I know it's weird, but I love talking about it.
I am realizing just how hard this job is, not because of the stress of teaching, not because of lesson planning, not because of discipline issues. It's because my heart breaks when I know after my kids leave my room they go home to situations that I can't even imagine, pain I will never understand, and trials (that they probably got themselves into) that force them to grow up so much sooner than necessary.
This week, I have read my devotional every day. It's difficult because it's creating a new habit despite my busy life, but the joy I have found during the last week in everything I do has been fabulous. I am rediscovering the real reason for this time of year and how my life needs to reflect the gift the Lord gave us in Jesus' birth, death, and resurrection.
so thankful my WHOLE life belongs to HIM
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Rejoicing
I have been struggling with reading my Bible daily...some weeks even picking it up at all except on Sunday, when I am "supposed to". Most of the time I am just lazy, or I find ANY other thing to occupy my time instead of facing what the Lord is trying to teach me head on.
Today, I discovered reading plans on the YouVersion app on my phone. I am starting with the Carols: a Christmas Devotional and Rediscoving the Christmas Season. I pray that the Lord opens my heart to what he has in store for my life by getting back into his word.
The question from the Carols devotional was "What do you plan on rejoicing about this Christmas season?"
I am rejoicing that:
Today, I discovered reading plans on the YouVersion app on my phone. I am starting with the Carols: a Christmas Devotional and Rediscoving the Christmas Season. I pray that the Lord opens my heart to what he has in store for my life by getting back into his word.
The question from the Carols devotional was "What do you plan on rejoicing about this Christmas season?"
I am rejoicing that:
- I am in good health and have medication to help me remain that way
- I have a family who loves me that I live close to and see often
- I have a job that provides for me
- Most importantly: the SAVIOR of the WORLD was born, lived, and died solely for the sins of the world. HOW CAN WE NOT REJOICE ABOUT THAT??
Let's rejoice this Christmas Season because of the real reason we celebrate!
So thankful my life belongs to Him and that He will never give up on us even when we stray :)
If you would like to read with me...
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
the year is coming to an end
Thursday, October 13, 2011, is exactly one year after I was diagnosed with diabetes. I am tearing up as I write this as the emotions flood back from the last 365 days. It feels like it's been so much longer than that, but it's not. I really don't even know what to write at this point. I just know now that I can survive with this disease. I still ask the questions "why me?" "why now?" and "why this" all the time, but I know my Father in Heaven has a beautiful plan through this pain.
I went to Lubbock this past weekend and enjoyed some much needed friend/social time after the many hours spent at work the last few months. But the most wonderful part about being in Lubbock was going to my church there. Some friends of mine (and fellow bloggers) made a video talking about their recent pain to introduce a song we sang on Sunday. The song is called Forever Reign. Since Sunday, I have listened to the song over and over and over. It is just a wonderful reminder that He is good, love, light, hope, peace, true, joy, life, more, Lord, here, and God. No matter what season of life I am in, He is continuously ALL of those things. It has been far from easy the last 365 days, but I know He has carried me through the pain, fear, and anger.
On Sunday, we also had the privilege of hearing the Lord through Steve Grant, the chaplain for the Red Raider football team. He said some very convicting things that made me realize how selfish I have been the last few weeks. The Lord is trying to pull me away from everything so that I can begin to recognize His voice in the midst of all the other things drawing my attention. All I have been doing is fighting the feeling of lonesomeness by filling my time with other things so that I can continue to run from his voice.
The bridge in Forever Reign states, "My heart will sing, No other name, Jesus, Jesus" but the only part I would listen to was the verse where God is everything for ME. I would continue to forget my part, that I am to call on ONLY Jesus. My prayer going forward as year 2 begins is that my focus is not "poor me, I have diabetes" but that "my heart will sing no other name but Jesus."
I am so thankful that my life belongs to Him.
I went to Lubbock this past weekend and enjoyed some much needed friend/social time after the many hours spent at work the last few months. But the most wonderful part about being in Lubbock was going to my church there. Some friends of mine (and fellow bloggers) made a video talking about their recent pain to introduce a song we sang on Sunday. The song is called Forever Reign. Since Sunday, I have listened to the song over and over and over. It is just a wonderful reminder that He is good, love, light, hope, peace, true, joy, life, more, Lord, here, and God. No matter what season of life I am in, He is continuously ALL of those things. It has been far from easy the last 365 days, but I know He has carried me through the pain, fear, and anger.
On Sunday, we also had the privilege of hearing the Lord through Steve Grant, the chaplain for the Red Raider football team. He said some very convicting things that made me realize how selfish I have been the last few weeks. The Lord is trying to pull me away from everything so that I can begin to recognize His voice in the midst of all the other things drawing my attention. All I have been doing is fighting the feeling of lonesomeness by filling my time with other things so that I can continue to run from his voice.
The bridge in Forever Reign states, "My heart will sing, No other name, Jesus, Jesus" but the only part I would listen to was the verse where God is everything for ME. I would continue to forget my part, that I am to call on ONLY Jesus. My prayer going forward as year 2 begins is that my focus is not "poor me, I have diabetes" but that "my heart will sing no other name but Jesus."
I am so thankful that my life belongs to Him.
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